dimity_blue: (WhiteCollar - MozzieNeal)
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Title: The One With Mozzie and Neal
Author: Dimity Blue
Rating: All
Genre: gen, humour, crossover with Friends
Characters: Mozzie, Neal
Word Count: 307 words
Disclaimer: Not mine.

Spoilers: Contains a spoiler for White Collar, season 3, ep 4.

Summary: Mozzie is proud of being President of the Tenants' Committee. Even if the building is full of weirdos.

Note: In the Friends ep The One With the Girl Who Hits Joey (season 5, ep 15), Willie Garson played Steve, the president of the Tenants' Committee. In my head, that means Mozzie lives in Ross's apartment building.

This is pure silliness. You have been warned.


The One With Mozzie and Neal
by Dimity Blue

"How did you get to be the president of the Tenants' Committee?"

Mozzie took his president's badge out of Neal's hand and put it back in its place, giving it a happy little pat as he did so. "The tenants recognised my sterling worth and voted me in."

"No, really."

"I'm telling you! This place is full of oddballs." Mozzie ignored the look Neal was giving him. "Who else were they going to vote for? There's Kurt who still lives with his mother, Lola who teaches dancing naked under the moon and Home Ec, and don't even get me started on the cheapskate guy in 3B!"

"Cheapskate?"

"Uh huh! He refused to chip in for Howard's retirement, then came to his party and ate his cake!"

Neal had a pained look on his face, though Mozzie couldn't understand why.

"And it turned out the creepy guy looking for hot girls is a friend of his!" Mozzie had tried to get 3B evicted for that but, for some reason, the building owners hadn't considered it reason enough. "And...he's a paleontologist!" If that didn't prove he was weird, Mozzie didn't know what would.

"Wow, a paleontologist." Neal nodded. "I can see your concern."

"I told you. Anyone who goes around studying bones needs a hobby!"

"So, do they know about your hobbies?"

"My hobbies? I don't have weird hobbies. I've never done anything weird."

"Uh huh. Says the Dentist of Detroit."

"I told you; I was twelve! Dentists are scary at twelve."

"I'll take your word for it." Neal handed Mozzie his coat. "C'mon, we need to go meet Peter and help him with that fake Vermeer."

"And you call me weird." Mozzie put his coat on and followed him out of the door. "You need to stop working for the Feds - it's bad for your morals."

The end

Hope you liked it. Please let me know if you spot any mistakes.
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