More entitled asses: Your wedding gift isn't enough!

[dimity_blue]

I saw this on The Metro, but the original post appears on Mumsnet.

I recently attended an ex-colleague's wedding where, in response to a request for cash gifts, I sent what I thought was a pretty decent cheque (£100 if it matters, though I can't help feeling it shouldn't)

Last night I received an email which opened with a few comments about how glad they were to see everybody and how generous they'd all been, then said "we were surprised that your contribution didn't seem to match the warmth of your good wishes on our big day. In view of your own position, if you wanted to send any adjustment it would be thankfully received"

For someone who's not easily shocked I confess I'm utterly gobsmacked by this. So as not to drip feed I'll mention that "your own position" probably refers to a recent inheritance I've had, which maybe they expected something from (and this is an ex-colleague, remember, not a close friend or relative)

Please, anyone, what do I do now? I've never come across anything like this before and still can't quite believe they've done it - but since they have, should I reply, ring them, ignore it or what??

~~~

If I were the OP, I'd cancel the cheque. I think £100 is plenty generous enough for a close friend/relative, let alone an ex-colleague with greedy eyes on an inheritance I received!

Comments

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

Wow. Incredible.

Sadly, I've heard of this sort of thing happening before. I may have also read that specific story somewhere else too, but I don't think so, I think it was a different one, which must mean it happens often enough.

probably refers to a recent inheritance I've had, which maybe they expected something from (and this is an ex-colleague, remember, not a close friend or relative)

Even if this were a close friend... why would you expect something from that? Family member, okay, maybe. Or if the friend really needed the money, but your wedding is different from a friend needing a kidney transplant.


If I were the OP, I'd cancel the cheque

That was my first thought, too! Although by now it might be too late. :/

... I hate to think what the newlyweds said to any friends or family members who couldn't afford to give that much money.

[leesa_perrie]

I saw this on FB with an update. Apparently the cheque had been cashed before she received the email, so she couldn't cancel it. The OP replied with something like 'I assume this was an error', and she's stil waiting for a reply.

They should be glad that I'm not their ex-colleague, they wouldn't have gotten that much from me! I thought the OP was very generous, considering she's not a close friend or family! Some people are just ungrateful brats sometimes.

[vamysteryfan.livejournal.com]

"Entitled asses" pretty much sums it up.

[debris_k.livejournal.com]

The gall, to complain about the amount after caching the check! I was going to suggest the OP cancel the check and order the newlyweds 100 pounds worth of manure to be delivered at their doorstep, unpacked. Guess they can still order some if the reply they get isn't a groveling apology.

Also WTF, not even a relative but a coworker - and even if it was a relative one should never send out notes like that! If someone is a stingy scrooge and the newlyweds find that out the hard way that's on them, they'll know how to behave in the future, but retroactive whinging about a *gift* -- that's the height of rudeness IMHO.

[debris_k.livejournal.com]

For added fun, reading through the pages of comments on mumsnet someone linked to this wedding poem post in which the B&G were also money-grabbing asses: http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/2138616-Oh-do-I-have-a-new-low-in-wedding-poems-for-you?pg=2

The poems in the comments on page 2 (that I linked to) are so awesome, that couple totally deserved getting one from everyone they sent their money-demanding poem to. XD

[debris_k.livejournal.com]

And to counteract all the bad wibes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E__F5a2pQco Cats meeting puppies (for the first time, or something like it)

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the update on it, Leesa! I hadn't seen that part.

The nerve of those people is astounding.

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

I think so!

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

I've seen money grubbing poems before. Making it rhyme doesn't make it cute!

I wonder if anyone sent any of those poems back. :oD

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

Apparently they cashed the cheque before complaining to her. The nerve of some people!

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

The manure is a great idea! Perhaps with a cutesy rhyming poem. :oD

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

Aww, some of those were cute!

[amedia.livejournal.com]

A hundred pounds! OMG! That's like a hundred and fifty bucks! That is a huge wedding gift!!! I imagine the ex-colleague is going to get run over by a pretty big karma truck one of these days. I wonder how many other people got the letter--and how few friends the ex-colleague has left, if any?!

I mean, I know there's a vague not-quite-rule that your gift should roughly cancel out the price of your meal at the reception (it would have to be one hell of a reception for £100 not to be enough) ... but there's a MUCH stricter rule that presents are never to be expected--they're supposed to be a wonderful surprise!

[amedia.livejournal.com]

Awwww!!! Perfect stranger waving to say thanks for the cats and puppies--super cute!

Oh! And I just revisited the site, which I had left open in another window, and it had auto-rolled-over to dogs meeting kittens! It's like an IV drip of cuteness. :-)

[stargatesg1971.livejournal.com]

What a nerve! It's not about the value of a gift, it's about the sentinement that goes behind it. And if you ask me, a £100 is an extremely generous gift, not many people can afford such an expense in this day and age. In their shoes I would have told them exactly what I thought of their insult and cancelled the chq.

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

The OP mentioned something about a recent inheritance, so I think that's what the greedy couple were referring to. Hopefully that means they weren't quite crass enough to contact a bunch of people. (The OP was bad enough!)

[dimity-blue.livejournal.com]

Leesa saw an update: They cashed the cheque before bitching about it to the OP.

I'd call £100 generous too!

[stargatesg1971.livejournal.com]

I can't say I'm surprised to hear that they banked the chq first, they came across as hard-faced enough to do that.